Roses and Lies Read online

She was wearing a white blouse and grey skirt and pumps that made no noise when her feet hit the floor. He always hated those shoes. They announced whoever was coming to his office and it distracted him, but even as he saw her, he could not tell why her shoes never elicited that obnoxious sound. “Hello Pamela, how are you today?”

  “I am fine Allan; would you like to see anyone in the firm today? I am sorry I do not have your name on my appointment list.”

  “I would like to see you.”

  “Well, here I am. You have seen me, so?”

  “Would you like to go out to lunch with me today? In the next one hour?”

  “Excuse me?”

  “I would like to take you out to lunch Pamela. Before you dismiss me, just know that I am doing this because I would like to know you better. You are beautiful and intelligent and I am hoping that you will give me the chance to date you, so you can also know me better. Now, would you like to have lunch with me today?”

  “What if I have plans?”

  “Please cancel them. I drove all the way from the High Court to spend at least half an hour with you, it would be quite sad if I drove back without meeting my goal.”

  “So, going out to lunch with me is some kind of goal that you strike off your list.”

  “Yes, but only so that I get onto having dinner and then a movie and then lunch and a kiss and way up the ladder is probably being your husband!”

  “You are insane.”

  “All lawyers are insane or else we would not survive the defense strategy we take.”

  “Okay, but you will have to come back in an hour. I am working.”

  “No, I can wait; if you do not mind me sitting in the waiting area then I can wait for you.”

  “One hour is too long, you might get bored.”

  “Trust me; waiting for verdicts in courts take longer than this and besides, you just said you will have lunch with me, I believe I can wait.” They had lunch and extended it to dinner and soon every learned fellow along the corridors of justice knew that Allan and Pamela were dating. She smiled more often and he walked like a man out of prison. His colleagues paid up their bets saddened to have lost to this man from Micheni, but somewhere in between Telkom lines and walls of city buildings, people who mattered were already looking at him.

  III

  The first time he talked to Pamela about marriage was in his car as they were driving to Micheni. She was from a different tribe and her customs on such a union were strict. He had longed for more than kissing and holding her but Pamela stood her ground. She had a brain and a conviction. There were little things like how she folded his shirts that annoyed him, but he loved her cooking. His Mother had told him that he had to jump over walls to meet his beloved. She brushed her teeth too loudly and hated Aquafresh. She used Promise, but he could not stand that bitter thing. Why endure something bitter only to spit it? She wore red lipstick that made kissing her an endless search for the heavenly taste that was her lips. They had passed by a Total filling station to get some water when he asked her what she thought of marriage. Pamela was wearing a yellow sundress with green flowers and a wide hat. She turned to him and smiled then kept her mouth shut. They got back into the car and once he had started driving, she turned to him and smiled again.

  “I asked you a question Pamela but you have not answered me.”

  “Is that what you think?”

  “Please do not start arguing with me, you know we can do this the whole year. Tell me, honestly what do you think?”

  “Are you ready to settle down Allan?”

  “Yes, I am what about you?”

  “I can be persuaded to change my mind Allan. If you want to get married we have to do it the right way. You will approach my parents and ask for my hand in marriage and then the process of paying for dowry will begin and after that we can have a wedding, now does that answer your question?”

  “No, would you love being married to me?”

  “I love you Allan and if you are serious about us getting married then do something about it, but please understand that I have dreams. I would like to do things like spend time with my friends or travel, so when we are married do not expect me to quit my job or forget my dreams to please you, because I have worked so hard to get here and you will not spoil it for me. Is that clear Allan?” He hit the brakes, opened his door and walked over to her side and gently guided her out of the car and kissed her with all the love he had. Years later when Pamela would accuse him of cheating, he would look at her and see the passion he saw when he kissed her that sunny day on their way to Micheni. His hands travelled the soft curves that marked her hips and settled on her firm and soft buttocks and squeezed holding onto her as he kissed her lips all the way to her soul. When he stepped back, she was breathless and he could hardly move his legs but he smiled and said, “As clear as the day is my love.” He never got down on one knee or proposed in some wild bush, but he knew she would be his strength and even when he would come to close his eyes, it was her smile and touch that reminded him of what he had lived for. There were girls and then there was Pamela. He could accept their kisses and caresses but he only yearned for Pamela’s touch. When he worked on a case, he would give her a case scenario and together they would work on it. She would say, “You are so good at this sweetheart, why do you even need my opinion?” He would laugh and wink at her sometimes, but the truth was he valued her opinion and there would be no other woman who would take her place. So, they drove to Micheni to meet his parents. Once a village, Micheni now had a police post, two bars, a supermarket, three hotels, a disco and a murram road opening the small area to traders and the world. His parents welcomed them. His Father’s cough had gotten worse and he swayed with every motion like a ball bouncing on the ground. They would pause and wait for him to compose himself and then continue. He looked at Pamela and said, “you are welcome my daughter.” His mother did not speak for all that mattered had already been spoken by her husband. His mother excused herself and reached out to her husband before guiding him out of the sitting room into the verandah. Pamela tapped Allan’s shoulder, “How long has he been coughing?”

  “For years and when we took him to the doctor they found he had Bronchitis and he was treated. I thought he was better, but now, I am not so sure, why?”

  “Does he smoke?”

  “This is Micheni everyone his age smokes! We worked in the tobacco plantations down the valley, and he worked there from the moment he could grasp things.”

  “We need to take him to Kenyatta, immediately.”

  “We just got here Pamela. It is a long drive back to the city, can’t we go tomorrow?”

  “Listen, I know you are tired sweetheart, but we can get him some medicine from the dispensary so he can calm down, but we need to have a specialist look at him, please.”

  “You think he has cancer.”

  “He looks like he has lost half his weight sweetheart, please let us do what is right and make sure he has the best doctors. My friend works in Kenyatta; I can call her to get a doctor’s number.” They drove back to the city that night to see Dr. Suraya who confirmed that his father did have lung cancer but it was too far gone to be treated. They could relieve him of his pain but that was all they could do. It was 4:00am when Allan finally walked into the room where his Father lay and wept. He cried and called out to God and the angels to make his Father better but all he could hear was his Father’s voice, “You have done me proud my son. You learned more than a-ba-cha-da.” Mzee Kizito took his last breath three days later and none except his wife was brave enough to smile and thank the Lord for having granted her such a loving husband. So, it would be that Pamela’s people met Allan’s people at his Father’s funeral in Micheni. His mother urged him to go ahead with the marriage proposal and present Pamela’s people with the dowry. They were married at the St. Peter’s Church in Micheni six months later. Pamela wore her white gown and walked down the aisle accompanied by her Father and Mother. No matter how hard he tried,
Allan could never express how much he loved Pamela, he remembered being tired and nervous when she first walked into his room and let that bathrobe slip down her shoulders and onto the floor. He could give a detailed account of every curve, mark, dimple and mound that crowned Pamela but no one was bold enough to ask him, not that he would ever tell.

  IV

  Allan walked around Micheni two days after his Father’s burial. He went to the Micheni Primary School to visit his friend Anna who had been posted there after completing her Diploma in Basic education. He was welcomed by the stench of urine from the gate as he made his way to the administration block. It was a semi-permanent building with the words:

  Micheni Primary School

  Motto: Knowledge is Power

  Mission: To the best of the best

  Right below the words was an arrow pointing towards the school gate. His feet met with pieces of paper, mostly scripts that had been previously marked and graded that now served as wrapping paper for the mandazi Mama Rosy sold. It was ten o’clock, and his presence was acknowledged with shouts of praise and laughter by his Mathematics teacher “Mr. Equals,” and his colleagues sitting around the table. He joined them taking the seat at the far end and accepting the metal cup he was given. Mama Rosy poured him black tea and asked, “So, will you have mandazi or chapati?”

  “Give him two chapatis,